 "Out Here and Now — the portrait of a gay artist")
Balbir Krishan’s current phase of life is best described by the title of his solo exhibition — ‘Out Here and Now’. Having painted male nudes and other subjects since 2000, it is for the first time that he is exhibiting 20 of his works on homosexuality at Triveni Kala Sangam in New Delhi.
Through fine strokes, the paintings depict his journey of coming to terms with his sexuality. “What can be worse than the fact that you cannot speak about your sexuality openly in society. For years, I suppressed my feelings. I wanted death,” said Krishan, 38.
The paintings celebrating a gay man’s sexuality tread the fine line between political and the erotic. In the background there are conventional hues of sexuality which suggest that the artist aspires for a co-existence of both worlds. But the intention has gone unnoticed by some.
Around 10.30 am on Thursday, the last day of his show at the Lalit Kala Academy, a masked man attacked Krishan and damaged one of his works. The artist with prosthetic legs was pushed to the floor and repeatedly kicked by the attacker. The assailant managed to escape after being chased by security at the venue. The police registered a case on Friday.
The artists’ fraternity condemned the attack.
The incident was not an isolated one. Since the opening of his show in Delhi, on 1 January, some people visited the show just to express their displeasure at the subject of the exhibition. This was followed by threats over the phone, which the artist brought to the organisers’ notice. “There were days when discussions stretched for hours. I told them they had all the right to convey their opinion and disagreement,” he said.
He painted the canvas with pain, the feeling that defines his pictorial imagination, he said. As subjects, he explored prostitution, the Mumbai terror attacks and Tsunami in 2004. Krishan also loves painting human figures, both male and female.
His current show is dedicated to late Bhupen Khakhar, the contemporary Indian artist who created a series of paintings on homosexuality in 1987. Yayati, one of Khakhar’s works, was based on references to homosexuality in the Mahabharata. The painting is considered a breakthrough on the Indian art scene. “At that time, his paintings travelled across the country. But there was no hue and cry,” said Krishan.
Krishan, who comes from Uttar Pradesh, has been a regular to Delhi since 2003, when he showcased his work in the city for the first time. He said he was wrong in believing that he knew the city’s attitude. “This attack has shocked me,” he said. “I feel suffocated. These people (fanatics) want me to paint minus any emotions. They want to run the society on their own terms,” he added.
Krishan had almost packed his bags for his home in Bijrol, a village near Baghpat district in Uttar Pradesh. “I got support from many artists who said that if I go back (sic), I would send a wrong message to the fanatics. So, here I am at Triveni as per the schedule,” he said.
Krishan, an MF Hussain and Michelangelo fan, pursued MA in fine arts from Agra in 1996. The same year, he lost both his legs in a train accident. He picked up the brush again in 2000.
As a child, Balbir Singh (the name his family gave him) was aghast, confused and scared, when he realised that he was attracted to men. He attempted to kill himself twice before coming out to his family. “The way society perceives it, makes it appear that it is a curse.”
During one of his visits to Delhi, Balbir Singh found a friend in Krishan, his partner, who was studying theatre at the National School of Drama. Both changed their names to Balbir Krishan for all legal purposes. They became one. It has been 11 years since.
Back in Baghpat, Krishan said, his conventional family accepted him being different. “Will you believe that they, the people of a village, embraced me? They did.”
His choice of bold subjects have never created a flutter in the community or the government school where Krishan teaches Arts. “I have done all these paintings at home (sic),” he said.
Balbir Krishan’s show is on at Triveni Kala Sangam, New Delhi, till 15 December 2012.
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