The Abhishek Manu Singhvi Test of English

Last evening, I had much to be grateful to Abhishek Manu Singhvi for. In this age of twitter and SMS and short updates, even the best-read talk and write like schoolchildren in  standard 6, preferring to use short, mono and disyllabic words rather than pause for a moment and find and use the mot juste.

Mr. Singhvi has no such restraints; he demonstrates, through his stunning and captivating resignation letter , that, whatever the circumstances, he prefers the old school to the new. The result, and the reason for my gratitude, that he makes me pause to recall the meaning of some of his choice of words, and, in one instant, teaches me an absolutely new one.

The one word that I learned from his letter:

It’s a wonderful world, so full of mystery that my Microsoft Word dictionary doesn’t even know that it is one and allows me the option of ‘ignoring’ the fact that it doesn’t exist.

Words that one knew, but one had to jog one’s memory to recall the perfect meaning of:

The word means ‘a false or baseless, usually derogatory story, report, or rumour’. By the way, Times Now, it is not cannard, which is how you spelled it for the larger part of last evening.

The word means ‘lustful or lecherous’

Prurient

Having, inclined to have, or characterised by lascivious or lustful thoughts, desires, etc.

These four words are the highlights; there are more that you can savour if you took the trouble to read the entire text.

To fully appreciate my delight with Mr Singhvi’s letter, I’ve taken one paragraph from the original, followed by one that, perhaps, I would have written if I’d found myself in a similar situation (no pun intended).

“It is lamentable that such canards are being spread about a CD which has, in fact, been accepted thrice over to be fabricated and morphed. The driver’s disclosure statement to the police, his detailed written statement (ie written pleading) in the High Court and his oral statement recorded on oath physically in the presence of the judge, all explain how and why he created this fabrication,” Mr. Singhvi wrote.

This is infinitely richer than what I might have come out with:

“It’s sad that such lies are spread about a photoshopped CD. The driver has told the police why he lied.”

Thank you, Mr. Singhvi, for bringing a bit of sunshine into a dull existence.