From Faking News: Modi to give speech in Antarctica to improve ties with penguins

by idiot420 This story was first published in Faking News. New Delhi: In an attempt to improve bilateral relations of India with penguins, Prime Minister Narendra Modi has decided to go on a 3 day visit to the ice capped continent of Antarctica. During his trip, Modi will be meeting local penguins and will give a speech, which is expected to be attended by 50 thousand Modi fans (humans as well as penguins) from across the globe. With his Antarctica trip, Narendra Modi will become first Indian PM to address such a huge crowd at otherwise uninhabitable south pole. Ever since the news of this trip has gone public, die hard Modi fans want to leave no stone unturned in order to make the trip a huge success. “It’s time to show the penguin community and to the rest of world, how proud we are of our Prime Minister,” said Prateek, an excited young Modi fan, who along with his group of friends were ready to leave for the southern end of the world. [caption id=“attachment_1596003” align=“alignleft” width=“380”]  A screenshot from the film The March of the Penguins. AFP[/caption] Prateek and his friends have hired a boat and rented couple of drums. Their plan is to complete this dangerous journey to the South Pole chanting Modi-Modi. However, few private companies are even selling cruise liners’ tickets to help Modi fans reach Antarctica safely, but Prateek is not in mood to make this journey safe. “This is our big test, we have to prove how much we love Modi Ji. Making this journey super safe is pointless,” rued Prateek adding that he wants to do it the tougher way. Few of Modi’s close aides have already reached Antarctica and are attending meetings with penguins to make sure whole trip paases smoothly. “Prime Minister doesn’t want to terrify penguins as they are not habituated of seeing such a huge human gathering,” a PMO insider told Faking News on condition of anonymity, “Penguins are also being taught how to greet Modi.” Sources confirm that even news channels are gearing up for the big show. Although Congress and AAP have claimed that media was being paid to cover the event, TV channel editors deny this. “Who won’t want to see penguins standing up to the national anthem of India?” an editor argued, “It will give us the best TRPs.” Sources close to a big media house revealed that their lead anchor would be giving a live coverage from Antarctica wearing a penguin suit. “To warm up the audience, we will start airing a show named ‘Penguins ka Pyaar’ to let viewers know more about penguins and their culture,” said a source. Reportedly, another channel has asked one of its top anchors to finish the book – ‘How not to piss off penguins’ before going to Antarctica. “This is just to make sure that he doesn’t get involved into any kind of brawl with penguins,” reasoned channel’s top executive.