Female orgasm part 3: 5 sex positions that make it easier to orgasm

We’ve discussed   why some women can’t orgasm  and we’ve talked about the many   ways you can overcome anorgasmia  in the first two parts of this series. But here’s a cheat sheet - a few sex positions that, given the right mood, might make it easier for a woman to orgasm. Whether you’re interested in this for yourself or your partner, you’ll do well to remember one thing while experimenting with sex positions. There is no “right” way to have sex. So try variations no one has ever written about, laugh when you roll off the bed accidentally, hug your partner if one of you pulls a muscle and just goof around to take the pressure off. Once you’ve dropped the expectations, it’ll get easier to be in the moment and just enjoy yourself. Alright, onto your positions now!  

1. Doggy style

How to: Get on all fours, facing away from your partner. Have you partner get on his knees and enter from behind. If you have a big, sturdy sofa, try this over there. You will have the added benefit of leaning on the back of the sofa so your arms won’t get too tired.  

Doggy style always gets mixed reviews when it comes to women but then again, it has a lot to do with the angles. Height might be a superficial feature but it can make or break certain sex positions. So while we are recommending doggy style for the deep penetration it allows, remember to adjust with pillows if there is any need. The success of this position would also depend on how you and your partner fit. Some women can find this position extremely uncomfortable and make them want to rush to the loo - believe us when we say, you’re not the only one. It’s okay to skip over to another option if it makes you feel that way.  

2. Thigh tide

How to: Have your partner lie down while you get on top. The key is to get your legs in a “scissoring” position, with one of his legs between yours (ask him to bend one leg so you can slide your knee under it). This way, during penetration, your clitoris would rub against his thigh. You can also do this lying down if you don’t want to control the speed and depth.

This position is all about clitoral stimulation, which is the easiest way to reach an orgasm for most women. It’s all about the grind, and the woman is the one who has to control it - so don’t feel at all embarrassed about humping your partner’s thigh like an animal. That’s the whole point of the position. The combination of penetration and clitoral stimulation might help close the gap between you and that orgasm.  

3. Woman on top

How to: Pretty basic. Have your partner lie down, and get on top. You can hold onto the headboard for balance or just put your hands on your partner’s chest. You can keep the lower part of your legs flat on the bed during intercourse. A variation worth trying is to only rest your feet on the bed while your pelvis moves. You can also use a few pillows to prop your partner up a bit if it helps your angle of penetration.

The woman-on-top position has always been a favourite among women for the kind of control it gives them. Then again, depending on what you like in bed, you might not even want the control. Here’s what you can do to make things interesting, though - play with yourself. As mentioned, clitoral stimulation is your best bet here. So touch yourself, or since your partner’s hands are free, ask him to do it. Remember, an orgasm has many health benefits and it is totally worth the time and energy you invest in it.  

4. Prone bone  

How to: Lie down on the bed on your stomach, and turn your head sideways. You can prop a pillow or two under your hips for deeper penetration. Have your partner lay on top of you, propping himself up with the help of his arms on either side of you.    

It’s a bit less popular compared to the other positions but definitely still worth a try. No matter what position you get into, you usually don’t feel the entire weight of your partner ever. But this position is different that way. The whole idea is for you to feel the weight of your partner’s body. Some women find it to be relaxing - if woman-on-top is all about taking charge, this is completely on the other end of the spectrum. You can also easily add clitoral stimulation to the mix - it would be easier to do it yourself since your partner still has to make sure they don’t squish you completely.  

5. Standing sex  

How to: The classic way would be to lean against a wall, have your partner stand in front of you, prop one of your legs up to make penetration easier. There will definitely be friction with the wall behind you, so keep your shirt on or prop yourself up against a table or countertop instead. An excellent variation, mix doggy style and standing sex. You can stand in front of a table, place your hands on it and bend a little forward. Have your partner hold onto your hips and enter from behind.    

Barring a situation of an extreme height difference between you and your partner, this position can be a lot of fun. Also, moving out of the bed area can help spark excitement as well. Plus, if you push your hips a little ahead in the classic way, you may increase chances of stimulating your G-spot. Again, get your hands involved and tease your clitoris to take things up a notch.  

Bonus tips:  

1. You can try a dozen different sex positions but they won’t work if your head isn’t in the game. Don’t be entirely focused on trying to orgasm, but don’t start making your grocery list in your head either. Be present, feel all the sensations, focus on what each part of your body is feeling. Don’t let yourself be distracted by any other thoughts.  

2. If this seems tough, start by just thinking of sexy things, stuff that turns you on. If there is something specific that helps you orgasm while masturbating, try that when you’re with your partner while also involving him in it as much as possible. Situational anorgasmia can be frustrating, but there is a way to overcome it if you and your partner talk to each other candidly.

3. Make sure the environment in which you’re having sex is safe and secure. Your guard may be up if you feel like a roommate could walk in at any time or if you’re not entirely certain about your partner. So lock the doors, shut the blinds and curtains, and make sure you’re getting into bed with someone you trust!

There is a lot you can do to try and have an orgasm. But if nothing works, you must remember - it’s also okay to take a break from all the trying. It can be pretty exhausting! And not being able to have an orgasm is not the end of your sex life. An orgasm might be the destination but the journey can be just as enjoyable. Be loud, let your toes curl, scream out loud if that is what you feel like doing. It’s not like these reactions are only acceptable for when you reach your peak. Feel free to express yourself however you like, there is no rule book when it comes to sex.  

This is the final article in a three-part series on the female orgasm.

For more information, read our article on   Orgasms_._

Health articles in Firstpost are written by myUpchar.com, India’s first and biggest resource for verified medical information. At myUpchar, researchers and journalists work with doctors to bring you information on all things health.