Single this Valentine's Day? Dating surrogates are just for you

Fake dating a friend or coworker and later falling in love with them is an age-old trope of romantic comedies. From The Proposal to The Perfect Date, movies over the years have used this fauxmance or fake romance plot to swoon audiences. But, did you know that in the era of social media, a surrogate or fake date is not just limited to movies and books and that you can actually hire people to go out on dates with you? Let’s take a closer look at how this works in the real life. Not a new concept The concept of online dating surrogates can be traced nearly a decade back. In 2014, a woman said she was paid $100 a week by a rich New York man to scout dates for him. Meredith Haggerty, a New York editor for The Date Report, was hired by a man named Josh who wanted her to find a “pretty, thin, white, and educated woman in her 20s and 30s” for which he was paying her $100 a week to spend around an hour a day looking for dates, reported Business Insider. Haggerty set up a fake profile on Match.com account to search for women and would send Josh a document of 10 women, consisting of their photos and usernames five times a week. He would then choose the ones he was interested in, as per Business Insider. ALSO READ: On Valentine's Day, a look back at the history of the soulmate Dating surrogates in India Indians are also exploring the field of surrogacy dates or mock dates before they venture out on a real one. Aili Seghetti, a consumer researcher and intimacy coach, runs The Intimacy Curator which helps people in dating better. The online platform offers “dating, relationship and intimacy coaching services”, as per BBC. Seghetti, who moved from the United Kingdom (UK) to India 15 years back and currently lives in Mumbai, told VICE last year that she found herself in the midst of a “toxic” dating culture here. “I would go on these dates and they were just so… bad. The communication between men and women in India can get very confusing because of how fast gender roles are changing. India is culturally experiencing a shift. We have more women earning their own money, and openly seeking and having sex. There is also a transition happening from arranged to love marriages. All these factors have led to [a dating culture where] men and women don’t know how to behave with each other, especially when you move beyond the English-speaking metros,” she was quoted as saying by VICE. Seghetti, who leads a team of four other dating surrogates, said that is how she came up with The Intimacy Curator. [caption id=“attachment_12153762” align=“alignnone” width=“640”] A dating surrogate coaches clients and plans mock dates. Pixabay (Representational Image)[/caption] As per BBC, her company’s dating surrogacy package ranges from Rs 12,000 to Rs 80,000, while the service can last anywhere between a week to three months. Other apps such as Dating Accelerator and haveyoumeturself have also propped up in India in the last few years that teach people how to date properly, reported BBC. ALSO READ: Love in the time of algorithms: Would you let artificial intelligence choose your partner? How does it work? People can sign up for online sessions conducted by dating coaches at The Intimacy Curator. They then get a dating surrogate who coaches them and plans mock dates. Speaking to VICE, Seghetti said in 2022, “A dating surrogate is someone who helps you date better through experiential learning, because dating is something you need to experience, and not just read about or talk about". “As a dating surrogate, we are trained to experientially teach you things, which we do by going on dates and giving live feedback on what you’ve said, your body language and eye contact, as well as help you with grooming, styling, and topics of conversations.” Further, she explained that a dating surrogate is different from professional boyfriends and girlfriends as well as a dating coach. “In this setup we teach people how to connect with themselves if they’re shy, awkward, not used to interacting with the opposite gender or are just discovering their sexual preference,” Seghetti told VICE. For this, Seghetti arranges counselling sessions with her clients to understand their preferences, fears and desires. She also generally conducts a personality test to learn about the client better. She also plans a date as per the client’s interests and preferences, reported VICE. Her company also teaches its clients about consent and intimacy and even how to deal with rejections. “If they are ready or have decided they want to hook up with their date, we take them through how to ask for consent, the different types of touch, and breathing exercises to create an erotic experience,” the founder said. [caption id=“attachment_12153812” align=“alignnone” width=“640”] Dating surrogates also helps clients with intimacy and facing rejection. Pixabay (Representational Image)[/caption] Akansha, whose name was changed by BBC on request, went on three mock dates with Seghetti. The Intimacy Curator founder gave her feedback on body language, how to manage nervousness as well as advice on grooming and styling. Akansha, who identifies as queer, told BBC that she wanted to get rid of inhibitions around dating and her experience with surrogacy dates has helped her become more comfortable. As per Seghetti, the purpose of the dummy dates is not to “help you spew the best pick-up lines or become a skilled serial dater. It’s to help you understand yourself better so that you get better at revealing yourself”, BBC reported. With inputs from agencies Read all the  Latest News ,  Trending News ,  Cricket News ,  Bollywood News , India News  and  Entertainment News  here. Follow us on  Facebook,  Twitter and  Instagram.