Race and the pain of being a royal: Harry-Meghan’s shocking revelations in their Netflix series

‘How do the British royals live’ is a question that everyone has asked themselves at some point of their life. Now, Prince Harry and his wife, the Duchess of Sussex, Meghan, have revealed it all in their Netflix revelatory docuseries, Harry & Meghan. And it is full of bombshells!

Volume I of the show, which includes the first three hour-long episodes, was released on Thursday after months of speculation and delves deeper into their time as working senior members of the royal family and gives a glimpse into the beginnings of their whirlwind romance.

This is the first time after their tell-all interview with Oprah Winfrey that Meghan and Harry are speaking about all the negative press attention that compelled them to make the shock decision in 2020 to step down as senior members of the royal family.

If you don’t have time to watch the hour-long episodes, here’s a quick recap of what they revealed and for those interested, the next three episodes will release on 15 December.

Finding Meghan on Instagram

While some of the revelations on the Netflix docuseries are painful and reveal the “unconscious bias” around race within Buckingham Palace, there are also some cute and smile-inducing moments.

Harry in the series reveals the hilariously relatable way he first noticed his now wife. Meghan first caught the attention of Harry when he was scrolling through his Instagram feed, where he saw a clip that a mutual friend had posted with Meghan using the then-popular dog filter on Snapchat.

He then asked the friend to introduce the two through email, and they decided to exchange numbers.

While Meghan was in London for Wimbledon, they decided to meet for a drink. The date initially got off to a rough start, with Harry running nearly half an hour late. But by the end of their first meeting, their chemistry was so undeniable that they decided to have dinner together the following day.

Who was late for their first date? Harry & Meghan. Volume I: Now Streaming. pic.twitter.com/SEv8AqGZhR

— Netflix (@netflix) December 8, 2022

“He was just so fun, just so refreshingly fun. And that was the thing. We were like childlike together,” Meghan recalls.

“There was one photo. We just wanted to capture the feeling of just sitting in that little restaurant and going, ‘Oh, my gosh, I think we’re gonna give it a go’,” she adds.

And while most of us enjoy a third date at some fancy restaurant, Harry and Meghan’s third date took place in Botswana, Africa. They spent five days getting to know each other and Harry says in the series, “That was when it just hit me, like, ‘Okay, this girl, this woman is amazing, is everything I’ve been looking for, and she’s so comfortable and so relaxed in my company’.”

That ‘Nazi’ moment

In 2005, Prince Harry was at the receiving end of ire and uproar when an image of him dressed as a Nazi was splashed everywhere.

In the serial, the Royal says the incident was “one of the biggest mistakes of my life” and he felt “so ashamed afterwards.”

“All I wanted to do was make it right. I sat down and spoke to the chief rabbi in London, which had a profound effect on me. I went to Berlin and spoke to a Holocaust survivor. I could have just ignored it and made the same mistakes over again in my life. But I learned from that,” he says in one of the episodes.

A ‘practised engagement interview’

In an attempt to explain how their lives were orchestrated and how they weren’t allowed to tell their side of the story, Meghan in the third episode opens up about their engagement. She said that the entire episode felt like an “orchestrated reality show”.

She reveals that the interview took place following the pair’s engagement photoshoot with the press in Kensington Palace’s sunken gardens, with Meghan saying: “We went right inside. Took the coat off. Sat down and did the interview. It was all in that same moment.”

It was organised by the Kensington Palace press office as part of the handling of the announcement of Harry and Meghan’s engagement.

In the documentary, the couple were asked whether they were prepped with questions they might be asked, with the duchess saying: “Yeah. But then also like ‘and then there’ll be a moment when they’ll ask to see the ring’.”

She added: “My point is we weren’t allowed to tell our story because they didn’t want…” with Harry interjecting “We’ve never been allowed to tell our story… that’s the consistency.”

Intrusive media and lack of support from the Palace

A recurring theme in the episodes is just how intrusive the media has been and their unfair treatment of Meghan.

Harry reveals that he’s always been uncomfortable with the paparazzi since he was a child and believes the media see his “trauma” as their story to “control”. He addresses the royal rota — a system where the media is allocated slots to cover the members of the family.

He said: “If you’re part of the royal rota, you have priority over the story over everybody else. All royal news goes through the filter of all newspapers within the royal rota, most of which, apart from the Telegraph, happen to be tabloids.

“It all comes down to control, it’s like ‘this family is ours to exploit, their trauma is our story and our story and our narrative to control’.”

Meghan also opens up about how she has been treated by the press and while this part is no secret, some of the revelations were hard to watch. Referring to some of the reports about Meghan, she spoke of one which said: “Harry’s girl is (almost) straight outta Compton”.

Meghan says that the report was incorrect. “Firstly, I’m not from Compton, I’ve never lived in Compton, so it’s factually incorrect. But why do you have to make a dig at Compton?”

What Harry and Meghan found even more troubling, as they reveal, is that the Palace acted as if the press’ treatment of Meghan was a “rite of passage”. The couple say that they were advised not to say anything in response to all kinds of accusations and stories in the tabloids, including racist coverage of Meghan’s upbringing and life. Meghan says there was an assumption that things would get better if they didn’t acknowledge the coverage.

Harry reveals that some of the members of the family were like ‘right, but my wife had to go through that, so why should your girlfriend be treated any differently? Why should you get special treatment? Why should she be protected?’ And he responded, “The difference here is the race element.”

Fear of losing Meghan

Harry also reveals in the episodes that Meghan is similar to his mother, Diana. “So much of what Meghan is and how she is similar to my mum. She has the same compassion, she has the same empathy, she has the same confidence, she has this warmth about her,” said Harry.

He said that he feared that “history would repeat itself” when he married Meghan. “I accept that there will be people around the world who will fundamentally disagree with what I’ve done and how I’ve done it, but I knew that I had to do everything I could to protect my family, especially after what happened to my mum,” he said.

Formalities and awkward meetings with family

The episodes also reveal how Meghan was introduced to Harry’s family and the awkwardness of it all. Speaking of the first time she met Harry’s brother, Prince William, she says, “I remember I was in ripped jeans and I was barefoot. I was a hugger, always been a hugger. I didn’t realise that it is really jarring for a lot of Brits. I guess I started to understand very quickly that the formality on the outside carried through on the inside. That there is a forward-facing way of being. And then you close the door and you’re like, ‘Oh, great. Okay, we can relax now.’ But that formality carries over on both sides. And that was surprising to me.”

Harry said that his grandmother, Queen Elizabeth II, was the first senior member of the royal family to meet Meghan.

Meghan recalled being told that she would have to curtsy, while Harry said: “How do you explain that you bow to your grandmother? And that you all need to curtsy. Especially to an American. That’s weird.”

Meghan’s mom Doria Ragland speaks up

While Harry’s family has kept mum and not participated in the docuseries, Meghan’s mother Doria Ragland has spoken for the first time. Ragland talks about being “stalked by the paparazzi” and feeling “unsafe a lot.”

Ragland discloses she had to explain to her daughter that the backlash to her presence in the royal family was “about race.” “As a parent, in hindsight I would absolutely like to go back and have that very real conversation about how the world sees you,” she said.

As for what she thought of Harry? “He was six-foot-one, a handsome man with red hair, really great manners. He was just really nice. And they looked really happy together. Yeah, like he was the one.”

With inputs from agencies

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