I Love You movie review: Rakul Preet Singh and Pavail Gulati's film won't be loved back

Cast: Rakul Preet Singh, Pavail Gulati, Akshay Oberoi, Kiran Kumar Director: Nikhil Mahajan Language: Hindi Spoilers Ahead So who was the first stalker of Hindi cinema? Which is the first one-sided love story we made? Okay, which are the ones that come to mind quickly- Darr, Tere Naam, Raanjhanaa, Ae Dil Hai Mushkil maybe. The first and the last name have inspired a recent film that has dropped on JioCinema called I Love You. This declaration of love in three words itselfhe first and the last name have inspired a recent film that has dropped on JioCinema called I Love You. This declaration of love in three words itself reeks of one-sided feelings, never seen anyone exclaim You Love Me. The one-sided lover here is Pavail Gulati, a love-struck, gullible employee at a posh office who’s fallen for his colleague Satya (Rakul Preet Singh). In a flashback, we see how it all began for him and how Rakesh Oberoi became RO for the woman he began pining for. Yes, the water purifier joke has already been taken care of. Notice his T-shirts, one of them reads Protagonist and the other Palat, he’s full filmy and even mouths that infamous dialogue Ek Tarfa Pyaar from _ADHM_ . Even the site he stalks her on is called Friendzone. It’s hard to decide whether we should laugh at the lameness of the writing or is it already doing so by making the hero realize he doesn’t stand a chance. Oh yes, there’s a little bit of Jaan-E-Mann too, with Oberoi watching Satya at her home from his home on a projector while having food. Wow! Somehow, writers and directors think making stories like these even today makes them edgy and different. But given the box-office the aforementioned monikers have had, why not continue writing such perplexing characters. Since this has streamed directly on digital, any debate is futile. Psychotic characters do give exciting opportunities to actors to play around with different emotions, but it’s the narrative that takes precedence and not the other way round. Writer-director Nikhil Mahajan chooses an office space to tell the story of this psychotic and problematic guy and how the lady he passionately loves is trapped. It’s an interesting idea since she barely spaces to run. [caption id=“attachment_12749952” align=“alignnone” width=“640”] I Love You[/caption] The twist comes even before it does, it comes due to the excessiveness of Gulati’s sweetness and his discomforting body language. When Satya asks him about her fiancé, he says he might be a little tied up; we have already been told it’s all literal. A wasted Akshay Oberoi who plays Singh’s fiancé then does multiple rounds of bench press, all bloodied, and what happens next is all asinine and Anjaam-like. Good actors shouldn’t be wasting their time on shoddy scripts like these that only harm their repertoire. I felt sadder for the fish Gulati has that’s named Anjali when it almost loses its life. He reveals it’s named after his former girlfriend who turned out to be way too smart. Only if Anjali from _Kuch Kuch Hota Hai_ took any pointers; oh yeah, that’s a one-sided saga too. Rating: 1.5 (out of 5 stars)

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