Of loitering and loss: Mourning a changed relationship with the sea, in a 'developing' city

The years 2020 and 2021 have been witness to the slow-but-inevitable coming-apart of our lives due to the coronavirus pandemic. Amid moments of turmoil and pain, what made life bearable — and perhaps even worth it for many of us — were the pockets of leisure and loiter we carved out for ourselves. Firstpost’s new series ‘Leisure & Loiter’ explores the value that these acts — and the many things that encompass them such as rest, love, pleasure, hobbies, travel, day-dreaming, food, conversation — add to our everyday existence. In Part 3, Gaurav Ogale mourns the loss of his connection to Mumbai’s sea. Read more from this series here .

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home | noun | həʊm — one’s place of residence; a familiar or usual setting; a place of origin; the social unit formed by a family living together

For many years, the answer to most of my inhibitions and emotional discomfort was a drive or a jog along the Haji Ali and Worli Sea Face promenades. There would be an unmistakable sense of relief or recluse that would set in when I looked at the unending expanse of the sea, heard the chatter that synced with the noise of the traffic and sound of the aggressive waves. I would jog, trying to match my pace with that of the breeze, and eventually this whole feeling of liberation became a pattern, which also came to signify one of the most comforting feelings that helped me make a home in the Maximum City. Mumbai has been a very special city for me; I actually think of it as a person, in addition to being my home. What happens when this feeling of home is suddenly taken away from you? With the coastal road slowly altering the visual and emotional landscape of the city, I feel as though I’m being distanced from my sea, or being abandoned in many ways. It is re-defining its expanse, its existence and its relationship with every person who used to speak to the sea, and who did not hesitate to trade their secrets with it.