 "Ashes 2017: If England and Australia were to sit down for a bridge-building Christmas dinner, here's how it will go")
A Melbourne hotel. After a so-far bad-tempered Ashes series — replete with generous sledging from both sides, a ‘friendly’ head-butt on Australia batsman Cameron Bancroft by England wicketkeeper Jonny Bairstow and Ben Duckett dousing James Anderson’s head with beer during a night out — England have invited their Australian counterparts for a festive meal to let bygones be bygones. The Christmas dinner is hosted by Ian Chappell and Ian Botham. Here’s what transpired ahead of the Boxing Day Ashes Test, which will start on Tuesday (we can only half vouch for its authenticity):
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