Why 'live-in sons-in-law' are up for grabs in China

The customs and traditions of marriage across the world are constantly changing.

Traditionally, women got married into the man’s family; however, the live-in son-in-law service offered in China is turning the tables on this notion.

A matchmaking agency has caught everyone’s eye in the neighbouring country for introducing the unconventional service.

Here’s all we know about it.

The live-in son-in-law service

The agency named Jindianzi located in Hangzhou’s Xiaoshan district in Zhejiang province in eastern China is offering a great match to their clients.

Typically, as per tradition, women are expected to leave behind their homes and families to live with their partner and their family after marriage.

However, under the new arrangement, the husband moves into the wife’s home, and their children take her surname, i.e., that of his father-in-law in most cases, according to South China Morning Post.

More from Explainers

How ChatGPT is becoming everyone’s BFF and why that’s dangerous This Week in Explainers: How recovering from Gen-Z protests is a Himalayan task for Nepal

A slogan on the wall of the corridor outside the agency reads, “Break the tradition of women marrying into men’s families, and start a new national campaign that marries men into women’s families.”

This agency’s unique approach gained significant attention during the Chinese Spring Festival earlier this February.

Chinese men are considering this as an opportunity to do away with the old customs and the burden of being a traditional husband.

The reason

Though the trend has only recently gained momentum, the practice has existed in Xiaoshan for decades.

The district reportedly ranks first in Gross Domestic Product (GDP) among the various districts of Hangzhou, China’s wealthiest cities.

Impact Shorts

More Shorts

Ghaziabad woman dead, pilgrims attacked in bus… How Nepal’s Gen-Z protests turned into a living hell for Indian tourists

Were bodyguards involved in Charlie Kirk’s shooting? The many conspiracies surrounding the killing

Many parents of women in the city refuse to allow their grandchildren to take the surname of another family as it symbolises giving away their wealth, according to the report.

Another reason for the practice is the additional compensation received for relocation by adding the husband’s name to the woman’s household.

According to SCMP, Chinese language has assigned traditional gender roles in the words for marriage, naming men marrying women Qu and women marrying men Jia.

Strict criteria

The live-in son-in-law must earn more than 100,000 yuan (~Rs 12 lakh) annually.

The groom should be “taller than 170 centimetres,” and “have a credit score of at least 560.”

One of the most important aspects is that men should not hold any criminal record or have tattoos on their bodies.

Also, the candidates should not be lazy.

Li Jiyan, the founder and top matchmaker at Jindianzi agency since 1999, told the mainland media outlet Jiupai News that the registration fee is 15,000 yuan per person to join the service for two years.

However, he made it clear the agency does not welcome men who only want to Tang Ping, meaning “lying flat,” a phrase that has become popular in China in recent years and refers to doing the bare minimum to get by.

Fierce competition

Li said the competition is fierce as the agency receives between “20 and 30 applications every day."

He noted that “an increasing number of men, including many university undergraduates, are applying to become live-in sons-in-law, expecting a wealthy wife to relieve the pressure on them to work hard and make money.”

The founder of the agency said that the most popular candidates are men with a steady job at a state-owned company, even more, popular than those who could “earn more than a million yuan but work 996”— 9 am to 9 pm, six days a week – “with an increasing risk of baldness,” presumably due to work stress.

While many men expressed a wish to become a live-in son-in-law, some debated that, “The live-in son-in-law phenomenon is still based on the traditional Jia and Qu gender hierarchy. I hope one day there will be no such difference, and getting married only means two people tying the knot.”

SCMP quoted another person on Weibo as saying, “Regardless of gender, some people just want to painlessly achieve success, and they consider marriage the easiest way.”

With inputs from agencies