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Small joys: Why you need you find your glimmer

FP Explainers November 7, 2023, 20:39:20 IST

Glimmers are small moments in our lives that usher the feelings of connection, calm, and joy. The concept, which is the opposite of triggers, has resonated among people on social media. Here’s how you can find your own glimmer

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Small joys: Why you need you find your glimmer

The word trigger has become a common part of our vocabulary now. As social media has made conversations around mental health more accessible, we are learning more and more about ourselves every day. While triggers are widely understood, there are not many people who are familiarised with the concept of glimmers. The method has also gained popularity on social media, especially TikTok. What are glimmers? Why should you chase them? Let’s take a closer look. Glimmers The term coined by Deb Dana, an American clinician and author specialising in complex trauma, in her 2018 book The Polyvagal Theory in Therapy is the opposite of triggers. Glimmers refers to small moments that usher feelings of connection, calm, and joy. “It is the tiny moments of joy, the moments of ‘okayness’ that take us away from being stuck in this challenging world we’re in, or our own trauma that’s sitting unprocessed, and it … helps build the capacity to then manage these other things in a different way,” Dana told HuffPost. [caption id=“attachment_13361452” align=“alignnone” width=“640”]glimmers Glimmers vary for different people. Pixabay (Representational Image)[/caption] Glimmers can vary for different people. For some, it may be basking in the winter sun, while for others it can be their favorite song playing on the radio. Other examples can be listening to the voice of your loved ones, spotting a rainbow, or even a stranger’s smile. “You feel something happen inside,” Dana was quoted as saying by USA Today. “There’s an energy that happens around a glimmer, and then your brain then marks it as well.” The idea seems to have resonated with youngsters online, with one video on TikTok alone racking up over 4 million views. ALSO READ: Want to boost productivity? Try getting angry at work Difference between triggers and glimmers While triggers send our body into fight, flight or freeze mode, glimmers make our nervous system feel safe or calm. “Glimmers have the opposite effect of triggers. Rather than triggering the nervous system’s survival responses, glimmers incite a sense of calm and relaxation. They return us to a state of homeostasis, where our system is balanced and regulated,” therapist Abby Rawlinson told PopSugar. Why you should seek glimmers Glimmers can benefit everyone, especially those who have experienced trauma , as recognising small, positive moments regularly can help in managing our triggers. “The thing I love about glimmers is that, working with trauma survivors, it’s so respectful of their suffering. It allows them to understand that their biology is wired in a way that we don’t discount the trauma or the crisis or the ongoing suffering, but we recognise that their biology is exquisitely set up to be able to also notice the micro-moments of goodness,” Dana told USA Today. If you do not know how to identify your glimmer, notice things or moments that bring you calm or connectedness or make you stop in awe, as per HuffPost. [caption id=“attachment_13361482” align=“alignnone” width=“640”]glimmers An expert suggests people to not shy away from acknowledging their feel-good emotions. Pixabay (Representational Image)[/caption] According to Rawlinson, there can be two types of glimmers: self-regulating and co-regulating. “Self-regulating glimmers are the things you can do on your own to bring yourself into regulation. For example, reading, creating, walking in nature, yoga, or a bath. Co-regulating glimmers are the things you do with others to come into regulation. For example, laughing with a friend, talking to a therapist, having a deep conversation with your partner, or cuddling a pet,” PopSugar quoted the trauma-informed integrative therapist as saying. Speaking to Australian Broadcasting Corporation (ABC), Tamara Cavenett, a clinical psychologist and former president of the Australian Psychological Society, explained: “The reality is your brain is designed to anticipate threats. It’s designed to walk into an environment, scan it for threats, think negatively and prepare itself accordingly. “Glimmers bring a sense of safety and connectedness that we often miss when we’re rushing about. When we’re scared or emotional, glimmers make us feel we can cope.” To make glimmers more impactful, Dana recommends finding someone you can share your glimmers with to create deeper “acceptance and connection”, reported HuffPost. Another expert suggests people to not shy away from acknowledging their feel-good emotions. “Sometimes, people don’t want to feel them because they know those emotions won’t last, or they might feel guilty for feeling good during a hard time in their lives. But trust that it’s OK to allow yourself to experience them. Enjoy them while they last. And know that you’ll have more moments of joy in the future as well,” Amy Morin, a licensed clinical social worker and editor-in-chief of Verywell Mind, was quoted as saying by USA Today. So, why don’t you go and explore your glimmers? It is worth at least a try, right? With inputs from agencies

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