Salman Khan inaugurates driving school: Anything, including these headlines, is now possible

On a day when Abu Salem and four others were sentenced in the 1993 Mumbai blasts case, Hurricane Irma flattened most of Barbuda, two trains derailed in North India and a bunch of other stuff was happening, one piece of news caught the attention of the FP Special Forces team assigned to the sensitive task of breaking news. And break, it did. Actor Salman Khan, it turns out, has inaugurated a driving school in Dubai.  Mid-Day reports that Khan inaugurated the Belhasa Driving Centre, owned by “Rashed Belhasa aka Money Kicks, the youngest billionaire on Instagram” in the very recent past. Far be it from us to dwell on the utter strangeness of having a person accused of having run over people sleeping on a pavement inaugurate an academy aimed at teaching people how to drive. Instead, we focused on the positives. Well, it was a positive. And that positive was that if Salman Khan can inaugurate a driving school, anything’s possible. Here’s a quick run through some other things that suddenly become possible now that Khan has inaugurated 15-year-old Belhasa’s driving school.

For the same reasons as above.

Reform begins at the top. Or in Vijay Mallya’s case, at rock bottom, but his experience should come in handy.

It could be stated that Hansie Cronje did deliver a speech on sports ethics after admitting to match-fixing. So, there’s no reason Salman Butt can’t do the same.

More power to the man. And having cornered the markets of instant noodles, toothpaste and everything in between, alcoholic beverages are the next step. Besides, who needs the King of Good Times when you’ve got the Guru of Go(o)d Times?

At last count, the MNS isn’t doing particularly well, so this could be the shot-in-the-arm the party needs… not to mention the greatly expanded voter base.

Err… too soon?