Let's cheer for Bollywood's Movember men — Ranveer, Shahid and Saif
Boys, whether you’re in Bollywood or not, if you’re reading this, don’t let the end of Movember deter you from rocking that facial hair.
It’s the end of Movember and there are enough bearded men floating around to send the security folks at American airports in a tizzy. I totally understand the latter’s POV because every time I see a bearded man, I have two very distinct reactions:
1. Must strip-search this one.
2. Must pretend to have walky-talky and call for backup (please don’t kill me mister I have a stuffed toy, a coffee machine and a spider in my storage cupboard – I call him Richard Webber - that need me).
For those of you still in the clean-shaven category, Movember is a portmanteau made from ‘moustache’ and ‘November’. It’s a month-long activity that helps the peeps at Gillette go on extended Diwali vacations. Men abandon their razors, and grow beards to raise awareness for health issues like prostate cancer and itchy armpits, or, in the case of Arjun Kapoor, to be taken seriously in life despite Aurangzeb. The Movember Foundation raises money for causes across the world all November and women are seen walking around rubbing Calamine lotion on their faces because beard-burn is not fun.
Perhaps in keeping with the spirit of Movember, or in a totally unrelated magical co-incidence, Bollywood’s leading men this month have also been sporting beards. The first one that comes to mind is Ranveer Singh, although that could’ve been a strategic decision on director Sanjay Leela Bhansali’s part – he wanted to cover Singh's face and focus on his body because it was the only way to make him seem attractive. Then there’s Shahid Kapoor in R... Rajkumar, who managed to stun everyone by growing a beard. Apparently, when Sonakshi Sinha saw it, she fainted. (The video of her fainting will make Rs 100 crores at the virtual box office.) And of course, there’s Saifu rocking that ‘stache and stubble in Bullett Raja, which, according to the promos, is solely responsible for this wretched heat spell in Mumbai.
Unfortunately for womankind, all three have managed to pull off the look rather well. Because, like it or not, beards work like guitars, alcohol and shoe-shopping on a lady’s libido. They succeed in making even the scrawniest of men suddenly resemble Bradley Cooper. Neil Nitin Mukesh can attest to this.
This is obviously rather unfair, because all any boy in Bollywood needs to do to become a man’s man is, it seems, grow a beard, while the girls have to struggle and be born as Kapoors or Khans or become ‘just friends’ with Kapoors or Khans.
So, boys, whether you’re in Bollywood or not, if you’re reading this, don’t let the end of Movember deter you from rocking that facial hair. I’d advise you to steer clear of airports though, but if you absolutely must take a flight, just make sure to leave your hand grenades behind, and you should be okay.
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