From Salman's stand-up to Anup Jalota's retirement plan, random thoughts on watching Bigg Boss 12

It’s the ninth month of 2018 and the twelfth season of Bigg Boss. There are either those who watch the controversial reality show or those who diss it. We at Firstpost, however, volunteered to watch the first few episodes out of sheer curiosity and here are some questions/observations/random thoughts we had: 1. Is that Simar from Sasural Simar Ka? When did she become a normal person? Last we checked, she was still a fly. We obviously did not get the memo. 2. Two representatives of rural India. Progressive colours, what a wow! 3. Representatives of rural India get ridiculed and silenced repeatedly by privileged co-contestants. Aww. 4. Anup Jalota’s retirement plan is enviable. The Bhajan King hasn’t moved an inch in the first episode even as the housemates and his protege, Jasleen Matharu, huddle around, making sure his tea cup remains full at all times. [caption id=“attachment_5300201” align=“alignnone” width=“825”]  Anup Jalota performing an adrenaline-pumping task in Bigg Boss 12. Image via Twitter/@SrkRocksNRules[/caption] 5. Sreesanth’s cardboard cutout would be more interesting to watch. 6. Jasleen may be that stranger plus one Anup Jalota was forced to enter the house with because the makers won’t allow stags. 7. Mr Jalota is more enthusiastic than Sreesanth in his sleep. 8. How is Shivashish breathing in those pants? Let’s call him Mr Tight Pants. 9. If you thought being pesky was Dolly Bindra’s shtick, meet the Khan Sisters. Don’t forget to sign our petition seeking their pre-mature elimination. 10. Sreesanth has woken up and is casually threatening other housemates. This might be a good time for a wild-card entry to keep him in check. Bhajji, what are you doing this week? [caption id=“attachment_5300361” align=“alignnone” width=“825”]  When you manage to get footage by staging a walkout. Image from Twitter/@Team_Sreesanth[/caption] 11. Fun idea for an epic meltdown: hide Karanvir Bohra’s cardio cycle. Dude hasn’t stopped cycling since he entered. 12. Kriti Verma is this season’s Roadies export. Definitely an upgrade from Prince ‘Tu Bahar Mil’ Narula. 13. When life gives you lemons, think of poor Roshmi who had to change into a swimsuit and get into the pool to impress Bigg Boss’ in house Bhajan King. 14. Salman Khan is singing.  15. Contestants who haven’t left a significant impression yet: can’t remember their names, next! 16. Weekend Ka Vaar might just be an excuse for Salman Khan to test his stand-up material. At this point, Khan’s breath is enough to send the contestants into a laughing fit. 17. Karanvir Bohra and Sreesanth are in the bathroom together. Cue fake guffaws and childish behaviour. We are in post-Section 377 India but Bigg Boss don’t care about that.