Love, sex and lots of dhoka: Emotional Atyachaar is back!

By Rajyasree Sen Can’t get enough of not-so-smart cheating couples heaping lewd and crude abuses on one another? Then don’t forget to turn on the TV tonight. Emotional Atyachaar Season 3 is back with a bang. And it’s bigger, sleazier and more shocking than ever. First, a confession: I enjoy watching Emotional Atyachaar. A UTV press release claims the show has “saved many youngsters who were at the brink of emotional destruction and that this truly has been the essence of the show”? Really now! More likely the show shoves the kids headlong into utter emotional destruction – and makes no bones about it. And that’s what’s great about EA: it is what it is, and doesn’t bother pretending otherwise. Love, sex aur dhoka Wondering if your partner is screwing around? Gone are the days when you were reduced to sleepless nights feeling wronged and suspicious. Now you can simply write in to Emotional Atyachaar. Just in case you’ve been living on Mars for the past two years, here’s how it works: once you’ve written in to the channel and your tale of woe sounds broadcast-worthy (read: suitably scandalous and sleazy), the production team starts trailing the suspected cheater. They then maneuver a chance meeting with a ‘honey-trap’ — a hot nubile boy or girl assigned with the task of tempting the target into committing TRP-worthy sins. Said hottie takes the cheater to a room and lures the cheater into some act of indiscretion— mostly just some heavy petting session— which is caught on the show’s spy cams. Cue the inevitable showdown where the cheater is variously slapped and abused by his/her partner. [caption id=“attachment_23551” align=“alignleft” width=“380” caption=“Another season of EA’s signature plotlines is coming up: people walloping their partners, mothers bashing up their daughter’s errant boyfriends, etc. Screen grab of Emotional Atyachaar 3 Website “] [/caption] Here’s the weird part: the suspects seem extremely eager to hook-up with strangers they meet by chance. The more circumspect ones merrily accompany the honey-trap to unknown rooms in unknown buildings (purportedly the honey-trap’s residence, but are in fact studios fitted out with EA’s cameras). The wilder ones just proceed to make out in hotel swimming pools, Delhi’s Waterworld or even your neighbourhood pub. In one episode, the suspected cheater was so happy to make out with the decoy on multiple terraces across Bombay’s highrises, that the channel had to actually edit out the racier parts of the secret footage. And once you’ve been caught, it’s not like the channel can just broadcast the spycam footage. The cheaters have to agree to sign a release form. If they don’t, what we see are those blurry faces. Are the participants paid to agree to sign the release forms or to appear on camera? Your guess is as good as mine. There was of course the episode which almost got the better of the team, when both the cheater and cheated were actually in cahoots and were simply pretending to cheat on each other while actually using the channel to get some publicity for themselves. Looking for a little slap-and-tickle Ajay Devgn has signed on as co-host for the new season, lending his stellar presence for a number of the episodes. The choice is, er, a little interesting. Devgn is a blend of Schwarzernegger and Charlie Sheen— with dialogue delivery skills of the former, playboy reputation of the other, but without the sense of humour or screen presence of either. According to reports, Devgn offers great sympathy and support to the cheaters, trying to understand what forced these poor sods to cheat. What a kind man he is. The season kicks off with a young woman whose partner approaches the channel to do a sting on her — and for good reason. The lady is simultaneously canoodling with three paramours; one of whom turns out to be her boyfriend’s best friend. EA is going feminist this time around, featuring many more female than male cheaters on the show. Bye, bye, Sati, Savitri et al. The show also hits a number of new cities this time round, including Lucknow, Delhi, Bombay and good old Calcutta, baby! Most of this season’s participants are from the uppity city of culture, bhadralok and literature. Will the cheated hurl abuses at the cheaters in chaste Bangla and then burst into Rabindra Sangeet to lament their betrayal ? All the Bengali mothers can now console their sons and renew their promise to protect them from the fallen women of Calcutta. Maybe the Bengali leg of the season could be hosted by Sourav Ganguly and Nagma. In all, get ready for yet another season of EA’s signature plotlines: people walloping their partners, mothers bashing up their daughter’s errant boyfriends, parents appearing at the site of the shoot and threatening to call the cops. Just fun and games as usual. And in case you’re bored with the predictable antics of Emotional Atyachaar, you could always watch UTV’s Superstud which is being hosted by Ashmit MMS Patel. I just saw the retina-scorching promo. An oiled up Kashmira Shah being massaged by strange men makes for scary TV— even for shock-proof EA fans like me. The channel really seems to be pulling out all stops in its effort to ‘shock and awe’ viewers this summer. Rajyasree Sen is a restaurateur, TV connoisseur and unsolicited opinion-giver.