Facebook is pretty much the town square of our times. Here’s where you meet long lost friends, hear about who is dating whom, look at the class clown make a fool of himself and even, God forbid.. read a bit of news from time to time. But lets face it. Some people on your timeline can be just plain annoying. And that's when you desperately wish that Facebook had a 'dislike' button, so you could let the world know how you really feel.
And Facebook seems to have heard us... at least partially. The site just released an option to Dislike, but at the moment only as part of a sticker pack for Messenger. So, though you can tell people what you think about their annoying status updates, pictures and opinions, its only via the IM app.
But this got us thinking. If Facebook were to release a proper dislike button for every post, what kind of stories would be the most 'disliked'? We came up with seven:
Passive Aggressive Status Messages:
Commonly known as “vaguebooking,” passive aggressive status updates are the kinds that make you wish you had a pistol handy. Not to shoot the writer, but to shove the barrel in your own mouth and blow your brains out. “Ugh, some people just need to learn some manners.” Yeah, maybe you should go and give them your two-cents instead of making 650 friends read about it. Disliked.
Oh, the irony (Image credit: Failblog)
Even more annoying are people who come up and ask “Wht hapnd, dear? Did some1 say somthng?” This gets followed by, “Nothing, I don’t want to talk about it.” We would probably break the Dislike button on this status message.
Hi, there! Want to play Farmville, Dogville, Catville, Pikachuville with me? Dislike.
I will burn your farm down
Apparently we’re on Facebook only to help you water your virtual farm and feed your virtual pet. No, we don’t want to know how many cases you solved on Criminal Case; we've watched enough CID to last us a lifetime. And we don’t wish to send you any lives on Candy Crush either, especially when you refuse to have one outside the game. We will also dislike your many Bitstrip adventures through a day. If the virtual you is out taking on the day, why are you sitting on your desk making comics about it?
Oh dear, see that sponsored post, Facebook? Yeah, Dislike, bro. Scrolling through your News Feed becomes a real pain with Facebook throwing up sponsored stories and ads into the mix. Also, in a move from your worst social networking nightmare, Facebook has introduced auto-play ads for the website and mobile versions of the ad. You’re not watching my video ads, asks Facebook. No problem, I’ll make you watch them.
If Facebook introduced a Like-Dislike counter like Reddit, advertisers would probably quit and take off to the Himalayas.
Don't overuse memes
Enough said. Your overuse of memes is killing our brain cells. Dislike.
Did you know these truths about this lady leader of this political party? Did you know I’m voting for this one political who will change India into a better place? Did you know I’m…Dislike!
Oh, hey guys! Unless you tell us which politician you like on Facebook, how will the elections work?
Golly, we had no clue proclaiming your love for a political party on Facebook has suddenly became everyone’s favourite pastime before the election year. Half truths, jingoistic claims, racist and sexist posts are just half the story. You desperately need a Dislike button for the times when that acquaintance you thought was cool, actually turned out to be a right wing nut. Let the Dislike wars begin!
1 Like= 1 prayer, 1 Like = $1:
“Lyk dis post and FB will donate $1”. Really? Dislike.
What? That's such a bad deal!
If you really think that you can feed children by liking pictures, what happens when we dislike yours? Think about it. Dont get us wrong; we wouldn’t be disliking your intentions, but your naïveté. Imagine this: A child needs $100,000 for a surgery but his picture gets only 99,999 likes. Do you really think Facebook would then wait for yet another like before the surgery goes through?
Ex-boyfriend/girlfriend’s wedding pictures:
Oh, the agony! You’ve barely gotten over them and you’re seeing them in fake wedding poses with their newer better half. And the honeymoon pictures where the happy couple is wearing oversized glasses and wide hats. You may have unfriended them but you can’t possibly stop your common friends from writing “Cute couple, god bless”, can you? Dislike.
Go ahead, like my wedding pictures (Image credit: Rring.us)
What stories on Facebook would you dislike most often and make enemies in the process? Let us know and keep it funny, guys.
Published Date: Dec 19, 2013 01:51 pm | Updated Date: Dec 19, 2013 01:51 pm