Spike Jonze's vision of future might be upon us sooner than expected, thanks to Apple.
Having an advanced wireless device plugged into your ear which helps you to handle all your communications, listen to good ol' music and talk to an AI? The future sounds exciting. Or at least, that's what Apple would have you believe.
With the launch of Apple's iPhone 7, the company has decided to kill off the 3.5mm headphone jack. And although there are options to work around it, what Apple seems to be planning to push is something called an AirPods.
Now let us explain what these AirPods are all about.
The first thing to understand about technology designed for day to day use always sounds way more amazing when the seller's marketing team is gloating over it then what you finally end up inserting into your ear holes.
The AirPods communicate with each other and with iDevices via a proprietary W1 chip that is supposedly a kind of ultra-low power Bluetooth standard. Yes, we don't understand Japanese either, but Apple is apparently calling the move "courageous". Let our tech team explain you all about that "courage" here.
So the AirPods more or less look like what those friendly club bouncers' Bluetooth headsets would look like if they were designed by Apple.
But let's just say the looks are not the only concerning factors here.
The earphones of the future will cost you, wait for it...
Yes, three zeros after 1 and a 5.
The last time we spent anything close to that much on a set of earphones was... never.
And did we stress enough on the fact that they could potentially fall out of your ear at any time if you took just a step or two too briskly, or if you dozed off on your way to work after being inquired by your about the missing Rs 15,000 of their hard earned money?
So we here at FP Special Forces headquarters, have taken it on ourselves to make you understand the gravity of the situation you might soon be tempted to put yourself into.
Here are all the things you could (or maybe should) buy instead of the AirPods and save yourself the embarrassment of looking like a cheap version of RoboCop on the streets.
Yes, those are all phones and pretty good ones if you believe our tech team (we do) for less than the price of these AirPods.
Also, 59 not-so-recommended Freedom 251 phones, with some change to spare.
How about starting your day by not walking a mile and taking a dump in a hole? Sounds pretty good to us.
15,000 will buy you four toilets under the Swachh Bharat scheme at 4,000 per toilet, with enough money left to buy a few exhaust fans to go with them.
A living breathing companion
How about a dog (or a cat, snake, rabbit, bird, tortoise, fish)? An actual animal who will love you with all its heart, wait for you to get home and not judge you when you eat noodles with your fingers.
How about that?
A (fancy) bike
Want to listen to something that is not your mobile phone? What about the sound of the wind?
15,000 will buy you a Firefox Nitro bicycle which will help you get fit and live longer. So, long life versus earphones? You decide!
Old timer earphones
Rs 15,000 will buy you 50 Philips SHE1455BK earphones with a guarantee of not losing them just because you sneezed a bit too hard.
Or one of these bad boys.
Save your butt
What about just putting that Rs 15,000 in a bank account and using it when you get arrested for drinking in the middle of the street at 1 am on a Wednesday.
15,000 Pulse candies
Because each one of those will make you feel better about your life.